HAVE YOU CONSIDERED...

"People who need people are the luckiest people in the world."

Remember these words from a popular song? I like the music but believe the lyrics should be: "People who HAVE FRIENDS are the luckiest people in the world."

Lucky? Yes. But more than lucky. They are blessed by God. Jesus honored both the word "friend" and the relationship when He told His followers, "I no longer call you slaves, for a master does not confide in his slaves, now you are my friends, proved by the fact that I have told you everything the Father told me" (John 15: 15).

Jesus also spells out the character of friendship. His words indicate friends tell each other everything. They confide in each other without fear revealing their weaknesses, darkest secrets and past mistakes. Their relationship is based on unconditional love.

These are REAL friends. Often times we consider certain people as friends when actually they are only acquaintances. How do you tell the difference? Sometimes you can't until you find yourself between a rock and a hard place. When things go bad for us, some we thought were friends suddenly disappear. Real friends are beside you and with you through it all. They are there to cry with you when you hurt, and to rejoice with you in your joy. The Bible describes them this way: "There are friends who pretend to be friends, but there is a friend that sticketh closer than a brother (Proverbs 18:24).

I should not have been surprised when years ago a man told me that if a person has as many real friends as fingers on one hand, they are truly rich. Then, I wasn't sure. Now, experience has convinced me it is true. Nor am I surprised health professionals are now advising senior citizens that having friends is essential to good health and longevity.

Also, I have learned this kind of friend, real friends, are placed into our lives by Divine appointment. They are placed there by God for specific purposes and produce defining moments in our lives. I thank God for putting into my life cherished friends who have enriched my life.

Some friendships are established over time and process. Others occur instantly when there is an imminent mutual recognition of a oneness of spirit, though we do not know why.

For weeks I noticed as Alma and I walked on the beach at sunrise a lady sitting on the beach reading her Bible and meditating. We exchanged a friendly smile and wave but nothing more. One morning I felt God telling me to go speak to her. When I did I learned she is a committed Christian who make that daily beach time her "healing time." As we talked I discovered she has written a book. Interesting, so have I. She is an internationally acclaimed business motivational speaker. Wow, I too have done extensive motivational speaking to disabled people. Common interests and experiences are building blocks for meaningful relationships.

Several mornings later on the beach we exchanged copies of our books. When I gave her my book on overcoming depression, with emotion she said, "I know our meeting was appointed by God. For the past year I have been struggling with depression, the dark hour of my soul. For sure, God has put you in my life for a purpose."

When you have the joy of discovering a new friend with whom there is the immediate oneness of spirit, you have been blessed with a real friend. To you the experience may seem a surprise and a coincidence. Rest assure, to God it is neither. God planned it long ago just for you!

(Dr. French O'Shields is a Gaffney native and a retired Presbyterian minister.)