HAVE YOU CONSIDERED...

Dr. French O'Shields To My Grandson, Lee:

What an important day this is — the day you begin your college years. It may have seemed to you this day would never come. But now it has, and it begins a new era in your life.

To me the years have passed too quickly. It seems only a few years since I stood outside the delivery room. Your dad bounded through the double doors. Dressed in green scrubs and bubbling with excitement, he hugged me and said, "Dad, I got my boy!" We both wept with joy.

Now you are off to a big state university. These four years will be formative years in shaping your entire life. Yes, being away from home will give you the freedom to which you have looked forward. Freedom brings responsibilities: decisions to make, work to do, and new relationships to establish...all on your own.

With your kind and courteous nature, I believe you will allow your granddaddy to share some thoughts. My motivation is my love, care and desire for you to have a long, healthy and happy life. It is not that in college I did everything right. Much of what I share, I learned from the mistakes I made. I pray that you will be wise enough to benefit from what I learned.

First, NEVER FORGET THE REASON WHY YOU ARE GOING TO COLLEGE. College years may and can be fun years. But fun is not the reason you are there. Gaining spirit and pride in your university as you attend the big football games and other events is exciting. It is easy to lose focus of why you are there, and many do. You are there to take advantage of a privileged opportunity to prepare yourself to serve God and mankind in whatever way God leads.

While you are eagerly waiting for this day, your parents were devotedly preparing for it. They were endeavoring to nurture and ingrain in you spiritual roots and moral values so that when you "were on your own," you would have a sure foundation for the entire life. They were preparing financially also. College is expensive. For years they have done without to save money so that you could attend college. Do not waste their sacrifice and four years of your life. Stay focused!

Second, NEVER FORGET WHO YOU ARE. The first few months of college are overwhelming. Professors make assignments as if their course is your only course. It seems humanly impossible. Dormitory life requires adjustments. The food is not like mom's. This combines to cause you to think seriously of quitting college and settling for any job, far less than your dreams and goals.

In times like this, you sorely need to remember who you are: You are part of a family that loves you, cares about you, and desires life's very best for you. A family that has given you the inheritance of a Godly name and is depending on you to pass it on unchanged to the next generations.

More importantly, never forget you are a Christian. You are a member of the family of God and your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit who is in you (1 Cor. 6:19.) Jesus has priority claim on your life (Matt. 6:33). When facing the impossible, trust His power. When you face temptation, seek and rely on His strength to say no. When the world or others try to squeeze you into their mold and define who you are, always remember you are His and your life is in Him (Romans 12:2).

Third, BE VERY SELECTIVE IN THE FRIENDS YOU CHOOSE. Other than your salvation, there is no greater decision you will ever make in life than choosing your friends. Why? Because it is a fact proven by human behavior, that one becomes like the friends one chooses. The Bible puts the warning this way: "Do not be misled: bad companions corrupts one's character" (1 Corinthians: 15:33). Follow the advice of Proverbs and never choose as a friend one who is: a law breaker, a radical without character, of a violent temper, void of sexual morals, who drinks alcohol excessively to name a few. Never ride in the vehicle of a driver who is drinking. As a pastor I conducted the funeral service for too many who did. If Jesus would not approve of a person as your friend, neither should you. No one loves you like Jesus. Allow his sacrificial love for you to motivate you to do what is pleasing to Him. Strive to never violate who you are in Jesus by your choice of friends.

As you begin and continue this new wonderful era in your life, always know that your grandmother and I will think of and pray for you each day, and you will always be in our heart.

God's blessings and our love...Granddaddy.

(Dr. French O'Shields is a Gaffney native and a retired Presbyterian minister.)